OK.  I'm a generous person.  Although I have almost nothing myself, I give to the local food banks.  I donate clothes to the Salvation Army.  We give food to the homeless.  Is it too much to ask that of the 100 or so lemons my tree produces every year I get more than 1 or 2?


That's right.  ALL the rest are picked off my tree, many of them before they are yellow,  apparently by idiots who think they are limes.  There's one (of about six left) that we have been watching for optimum ripeness.  Ron goes out today to get it, and it's gone!  


So I'm trying to figure out how to stop this.  We planted the tree, nursed it through frosts, water it, feed it, mulch it, and we get just one or two lemons a year.  Tonight I typed a letter telling people to quit stealing our lemons, especially when still green because they are not limes!  We are printing a copy for each lemon left, and placing them in baggies, and attaching, with a red ribbon bow, one to each lemon left on the tree..


I am also planning to get a sign like candidates out.  It will say:


DO NOT STEAL! PRIVATE PROPERTY!
We are tired of getting only 1-2 lemons 
each year off our own tree!
PLANT YOUR OWN LEMON TREE!
INSTRUCTIONS FREE
INQUIRE BY KNOCKING


OR MAYBE THIS:


LEMONS/LIMONES  
ON TREE     RIPE        US           YOU


Then we keep a running count from the time the lemons start forming until they are gone.


Or maybe both signs.


The funny thing is, I live in a neighborhood in which almost everyone,  has an income twice the size of ours.  Some of those behind us are multimillionaires.  THESE are the people who are stealing from our tree.  Most of them are also Republicans and churchgoing  "Christians."   PFAH!


We are living mostly on peanut butter, tuna fish ($0.39/can), and chicken, and the food we grow that isn't stolen, and REALLY good buys we find occasionally..  We need these lemons for the vitamin C.  Unfortunately, the S and SE sides of our property are all outside the fence.  This is where the sun is.


Any comments?
 


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